Tuesday, May 4, 2010

I know you didn't, Billy Corgan!

Billy Corgan,

There are some things we, as humans, know instinctively not to do.  If it's rotten, don't eat it.  If it growls, don't pet it.  If it's Courtney Love, don't date it.  What is wrong with you? And now this?  Watching you ladies have a Twitter cat fight brings joy to my soul.  Really, it feels like Christmas came early.  But, I am worried  about the Smashing Pumpkins fans.  They're going to be upset when she cuts you with a broken bottle or stabs you with a hypodermic needle.  You're being very selfish, Billy. And what about Francis Bean?  That poor girl survived Courtney Love's womb and going through childhood with a name fit for a baby doll.  Now some 40-year-old bald guy is fawning over her on Twitter.  I've got news for you buddy, "creepy" is not a stretch for you.  You should probably tone it down with the whole, "your daughter is cooler than you" thing.  It's weird.

This drama is a bit over the top, even for a poet.  You do realize that you are the only person in the entire world who is surprised she ripped off your material.  She's Courtney Love.  It's her job to be sketchy, and she's a professional.  Speaking of jobs, yours is to write sonnets and avoid the sun, not have Twitter tantrums.  Get it together, Corgan.

Sincerely,
So What?  You're Famous.

5 comments:

  1. I am howling with laughter! My favorite line, "Speaking of jobs, yours it to write sonnets and avoid the sun, not have Twitter tantrums." Good stuff.

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  2. Ha, Twitter tantrums!

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  3. Billy Corrigan is creepy but he makes Courtney Love look like an elder stateswoman. They are made for each other!

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  4. Whoops, I mean Corgan. Who cares, both he and Love are disgusting!

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  5. How crazy is Courtney Love, I mean really? I wonder if Frances Bean sent her a Mother's Day card! Holy crap, is Betty Davis from 'Whatever Happened to Baby Jane' back from the grave? Look at her crazy, crazy face. Good God!

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